It happened. I failed. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Now, one of my mentors told me you can’t fail the MCAT. But in reality I think you can. I got a score 492, where I can’t apply to my dream school. Which means I failed.

I was a deep fog because of this. I didn’t know what was wrong but I was rethinking my whole life. Maybe I’m not smart enough to me a doctor. Maybe I shouldn’t be a doctor. Maybe I can’t be a doctor.

In all honesty I think I wrote the MCAT completely burnt out. I had just moved across the country with absolutely alone. I couldn’t find stable housing till 2 months into my move. I was settling into a new 8-4 office job. I was juggling multiple projects that I love, but that all needed my attention. I was b-u-r-n-t-o-u-t. To a tee. I heard in a podcast by Kalyn Nicholson where she quoted a book she was reading “10% on 10 things is not the same as 100% on 1 thing”.  Think about that for a minute. That’s something I struggle with. When was the last time you focused on ONE thing? I don’t think I ever have. How can you focus on ONE thing?

This is something my partner has spoken to me about. But is something that I can’t quite wrap my head around. If I’m not doing more than one thing, I’m going to fall behind. I’m not going to be competitive. I’m not going to get into med school. But honestly, if I can’t succeed on ONE of the major metrics (the MCAT), I wouldn’t get into med school anyways.

So my challenge for the rest of the summer is to frankly, slow down. Focus on less (probably not ONE thing) things. I want to excel in everything I’m involved in right now. I love supporting the business and causes I’m involved in. So let’s see if we can SLOW DOWN, go maybe 70km/h versus 100km/h if we can accomplish more, but get to my goals/journey/destination.